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Frequently Asked Questions - Women
Question: My
Father met the man I want to marry. My ‘fiance’ came with his family and asked for my hand in marriage with respect.
My family is Punjabi and his family is Pathan. My Father did not receive them well. The shocking comment my
dad made to them was “The boy may be PERFECT but he is not Punjabi! This marriage can never take place”.I don’t want to marry anyone else as he is a good
man, pious and we love each other and both make each other stronger in the Deen. Islam is the way of life we want to follow.
Please Help. It all started when my father overheard me speaking
to a guy on my mobile. He questioned me and I finally admitted it was him. My brother already knew and has met my fiancé.
He agree with my choice and says he’s a nice guy. I am 22 years old and have finished my degree. We met at university.
He is 27 years old. His parents were really hurt by my father’s cold response when they came for
my rishta. My brother admitted that the guy was a good guy and a respectable Muslim. Now I am not trusted and can’t
leave the house. This guy and I are still in contact and we still want to marry, though my father thinks I’ll just forget
about him. My brother has said to give him at least 2 years and try persuading my father, though 2 years is a very long time
and me and this guy are happy to wait for another for a year but even this we highly doubt would change anything as my father
is the most Pakistani man on earth. I really do not know what to do. My father is happy for me to marry of my own choice apparently
so long as he is Punjabi. I on the other hand, do not want anyone else ...me and this guy respect one another, are compatible,
he changes me, he brings me more to Deen. I have forwarded the page on your website about 'marrying of your own choice
and emotional blackmail from parents due to cultural differences'. My father trusts me and says I am the backbone of the
family after my mother died. One of my sisters ‘honoured’ my dad and married from Pakistan. She is now living
with a man who swears, shouts, abuses her and my family, doesn’t work and takes all her money. She has her own problems
to worry about.
Please help me on this issue; I keep thinking to have sabar. Have sabar and my brother will help? but
will he really? Or is this some long time plan to distance myself and the person who I want to marry. I don’t even have
anyone whom I can turn to or can help me.
Answer: Assalamo alaykum
The most hurtful thing
about your fathers comment “your son may be perfect but he is not Punjabi, so this marriage can never take place.”
is that this is in no way a permissible reason to refuse this marriage proposal. Had he said the man is of bad character,
does not have a career or job or is incompatible in any other way it would have be justifiable.
The Prophet (saw) said:“When someone with whose religion
and character you are satisfied asks your daughter in marriage, agree to his request. If you do not do so, there will be temptation
on Earth and extensive corruption.“[Tirmidhi, Nasa'i & Ibn Majah]
Sadly
we do not live in the times of the Sahaba when Bilal al Habashi (from Ethiopia), Salam al Farsi ( from Persia)
Shuhayb Ar Rumi from Rome (May Allah be pleased with them) were not judged on their origins or descent
rather on their character.
We need to try and understand your father’s point of view. Your father is more
experienced than you and sees things differently possibly like this:
1. The Punjabi and Pathan way of life is very different in terms of language, lifestyle, food
and customs. 2.
This will be a huge embarrassment in front of friends and family (izzat, besati,
honour). How will I show my face, when people ask me where did your daughter get married !!! 3. He
may just want what he is comfortable with and fear the unknown.
We have a duty
to our parents and we love them very much. But love should be a two way thing. Our parents have rights over us and we have
rights over them. You need to try and get as many people as possible (friends and family) including
your dad to understand that this is how we change ignorant & Jahil customs. By marrying someone who is not Punjabi we
can change this non Islamic tradition and revive the Sunnah. Our beloved Prophet (pbuh) the best of examples married outside
his own tribe. Tribalism / Assabiya is totally haram and strictly condemned
in Islam as one of the biggest sins and reasons for our disunity. The Messenger of Allah
(s.a.w) also said,
"There is no superiority for an Arab over a non-Arab
and for a non-Arab over an Arab; nor for white over the black nor for the black over the white except in piety. Verily
the best among you is he who has the most taqwah (piety)." (Bukhari)
It may be that
your father will never see the truth because changing people’s mindset is the hardest thing on earth. You are very
lucky and blessed to have a supportive brother. You need to make sure your brother understands clearly that what you are asking
him to support you on is your right given by Allah Tala. Your brother helping you is Jihad, a struggle
to fight these prejudices.
You are also very
blessed that your fiancé’s family came to ask for your hand in marriage so they are willing to accept you. Most
people have a problem from parents on both sides. Alhamdulillah you are in a much better position than tens of thousands of
sisters. Most of whom are threatened by their own brothers (born and bought up in the west ) who say they will kill their
sisters if they go against their fathers wish and culture. Also usually parents on both sides are ready to disown. It doesn’t
mean its easy but count your blessings. We as Muslims, should always look at those worse off than us. You
are also right about NOT waiting 2 years. This will be hopeless. A decision now or in two years will be the same. Rather it
can make it worse if you wait as your father may hope that with time you will forget him. I feel your brother may be buying
time and avoiding this difficult and confrontational situation. Also Islamically it is regarded as extremely undesirable (maybe
even sinful) to keep your daughter unmarried especially when she wants to complete half her deen and get
married. The most important thing in the world is Al Islam, Our Deen, Our Way Of
Life. If your future husband and you have a good understanding, can be happy together
and create a good family unit, then unless an Islamic reason can be given, no one can object. Not even
your father. You respect each other and want to make each other better Muslims and human beings. That’s the most valuable
thing in the world. In the days of the Islamic State and Khilafah, a Qadi
(Islamic judge) would have ruled in your favour and given you permission. But sadly now, there is no such country so we have
to do these things ourselves. Now dealing with the consequences. You
may be disowned by your father if you go ahead with this. Usually in the short to medium term. You mentioned you being the
backbone of my family. Your family have to decide if they want you there for them. You are not refusing to be there for them,
rather the opposite. You are sinful if you want to cut off from them but you don’t so the responsibility is on their
shoulders to allow you to marry and be there for them also. Also after marriage your priorities will have to change as you
will have a husband and a new family too. Now if your brother can be your Wali then you can have your Nikah done. Again you
are so fortunate as so many women can’t find or don’t have a Wali. In these circumstances you do not need a Wali
according to many scholars. If you wanted to have 100% peace of mind to satisfy your dad, you could have looked at a few Punjabi
brothers (not from Pakistan but British!) beforehand. But you fell in love with a Muslim man and that is no sin, so don’t
worry about that aspect. Also your father may or may not have been happy with your choice even if he was
a Punjabi man. That’s what our experience tells us.
And lastly and
MOST importantly, you MUST do istikhara (as explained on our website). Allah will guide you in the right
direction. Don’t run away, run towards Allah and you will know what to do.
Your brother Abd’Allah
Question: Can I get married without a Wali? I am divorced and my father is not agreeing on my marriage with someone
else.
Can I get married without a
wali. After divorce my father sent me back to my husbands house fearing the world. Now I want to marry someone, but my father
will not agree. So can I marry without his consent and then inform my family later. Right now I am living with my ex-husband.
Someone is ready to marry me and accept my daughter too. So will it be a sin for me to go against my father and marry him.
My parents don’t keep well and so if anything as to happen to them after I get married. Should I be blamed?
Answer:
In Islam your second marriage does NOT require a wali. Even with first time marriages there are valid
opinions that a waali is not needed. Please see our ‘Islamic Fatwas and Rulings’ page. It
is completely your choice and no sin on your neck for marrying this man. This is your choice and your Islamic right. It is
so disheartening to think that your father like so many of our parents is more than happy for you live in zina (fornication),
a massive sin, than to remarry a good man who will take on your daughter too. Nothing will happen to your parents if you marry
of your liking. No parents have ever suffered because of this except that they will be very upset that you went against their
unislamic culture. Time is a healer and they will get over it. You are accountable to Allah only for your actions and you
will be doing the rewardable acts of saving yourself from living in zina (which is a major sin) and getting married which
is an excellent act of virtue. Be strong, ask Allah for help, do istikhara, and do the right thing by getting married. May
Allah protect you and your child. Ameen
Question: My
dad want's me to get married his brothers son (my cousin).
OBVIOUSLY
WHY!! because he's stuck back in Pakistan and my dad wants him to come here for the sake of his own brother. The good thing is that my mom is against
this and she will help me reject the marriage, my mom totally supports me with this and so does my mom's brother!! and
NO it's not because my mom wants me to marry from her side either. But anyway..That’s that! i don't really have
to worry about the cousin thing but my mom doesn't want me to get marry here as well! She strictly told me not to have
any boyfriend (even though I never had one) and i totally respect her decision but i really don't want to marry someone
from Pakistan. I don't care if they are rich or they have a high degree or is a doctor because to me there Education is
more like "getting through" like it's mostly memorizing stuff, even cheating...but that's not what I’m
here to talk about. I just want to marry someone who loves me for what i am not because of my citizenship!
What should I do? How should I tell my mom
that I won't be happy with any one from Pakistan no matter what they have, because there thinking and my thinking would
not even match at all. My mom always hates guys from here, she says all of them can't take responsibility and etc but
all of them aren't the same !! I don't know can you please give me some advice . Thank you
Answer:
Your
dilemma is a very common one. Please visit our ‘Marrying of your own choice’ page. You basically have to be strong
and stand up for what is right. Speak to your parents with respect and explain you reasons which are perfectly acceptable
in Islam. Your
happiness normally will not mean anything to our parent’s generation as for them their culture comes first.
Their family
loyalties are much more powerful than your happiness. Besides, marriages to cousins from Pakistan and in this culture are
not done for happiness. They are done to please their relatives. The same relatives who have normally never given a damn about
your parents or have even taken over their land and property in Pakistan are at your door. Now that they want your hand in
marriage you will get phone calls and even maybe presents. All to get that crucial visa and passport.
Your whole life, future, happiness
and next generation depend on you being confident and strong for this, the most important decision of your life. It’s
not easy we understand that but you can do it. Just like so many others who have succeeded. Those that are
too weak and we hear of so many sadly end up in a life full of abuse, sadness and normally depression.
As regards to guys from your country
Canada, they may not be able to talk the talk like guys from there but at least most of them are straight forward , honest
and have lots in common with you. This is because in Canada or England we are not normally bought up to lie and cheat.
Sadly,
Pakistan is a very corrupt society and its people have mostly become accustomed to lying, deception and hypocrisy. You see
a man or woman from there knows how to sweet talk and come across as very respectful. But we have thousands of emails explaining
this to be fake and just a cover for what they really believe in. Their primary purpose is money, status and their families
not you. They will use any means to get what they want and that includes destroying your life!
Question: My mother won’t allow me to marry of my choice she says it our culture
and I have to accept it. Is this right or do I have a choice?
My mother doesn't allow me and
my sister to marry an outsider. She says we have to marry from Pakistan. Its very strange how a British Pakistani goes
on a holiday to Pakistan but you never expected them to come back married. My other sister is 18. Me and her wish to
get married in England but my mum says its our culture we must get married to a our cousins is this true?
Me
and my sisters went to Pakistan last year but i cannot believe how many parents were so desperate for
a British girl to get married to their son because they really wanted to come to England. We went after 10 years
and I'm afraid to go back there again because i don't want to end up getting married like my older
sister. She is not happy at all in her marriage. What should i do if my parents don't agree to this and expect
me to get married in Pakistan?
Answer: Thank you for your email, you basically asked 2 questions:
My mum says that in our culture we must get married from Pakistan, is this true?
What you have to be very clear about is that the Pakistani culture is not part of Islam,
rather very few aspects of that culture are part of Islam. For example the weddings, married life, social life and inheritance
etc. This culture has very little of our Islamic values. You do not have to marry a cousin or anyone your parents say. If you agree to their choice 100%
willingly that is allowed but your heart and mind must both agree 100%. You must not marry for the sake of pleasing your parents.
This is not an Islamic concept.
In fact if you destroy your life and marry the wrong person they won’t be
able to help you or even be willing to, it will be too late.The Holy Prophet (pbuh) did not allow marriages that were not with the womans consent. There are many many
cultural things that people have made a part of Islam and unfortunately many Pakistani / Indian / Bangladeshi parents twist
things and emotionally blackmail their children into thinking that they are committing haram by being disobedient when you
don’t want to follow their cultural ways or marry of their choice. You Nikah will be haram with anybody whether its
your cousin or not if you do not want to marry this person.
Your future, your happiness and your future children
all depend on you marrying the right person and that person is not that person in Pakistan who you have no common values with,
no common ideas, beliefs, culture, sense of humour etc. When we die we will not be asked did we follow our culture instead
Allah will only ask us if we followed his way. If the culture does haram things will you follow it?
We have
not come across one happy marriage from Pakistan and if someone tells you otherwise they are either hiding their true feelings,
have no choice and are stuck in this marriage or too embarrassed to tell you. We get thousands of emails from British / western
women married to Pakistani men and they are not living in any sort of marriage. It is just a guy from Pakistan who is here
to make lots of money for his family back home and treat you worse than dirt. Is this what you really want? To
follow a corrupt unislamic culture is your destruction? Please, please please don’t destroy your life.
What should I do
if my parents don't agree to this and expect me to get married in Pakistan?
You
have to be strong and refuse to marry your cousin. Any marriage that is forced is not valid in Islam so you have to remain
strong and tell your parents politely you will not do this. You know the interesting thing is they can’t actually do
anything if you refuse to marry him. They might trick you and take you to Pakistan but you have to refuse to leave this country
(your country).
You can contact the forced marriages unit (please see Know Anyone Getting Married
tab on main page)Normally your mum and dad
will cry and threaten you that they will die, have a heart attack if you don’t marry of their choice.
NO ONE HAS EVER DIED OF A HEART ATTACK BECAUSE THEIR SON OR DAUGHTER MARRIED OF THEIR
OWN CHOICE. Its just a lie and don’t fall for it. Its simply
called emotional blackmail. Once you refuse and go through the tough time with them eventually they will accept it like they
have done with so many girls that refused to marry of their parent’s choice and especially from Pakistan. You are very
young at the moment and you have the whole of your life ahead of you (Insha’Allah) .
Do you really want
to sacrifice it all for the sake of backward cultural traditions? It’s not your parents who will have to live with this
man for the rest of your life it will be you living this hell. Another thing that we hear all the time is that relatives or siblings will make you feel bad by saying that
‘’ We had to marry our cousins / parents choice, so what makes you so special that you can marry someone
else?’’ . Please, please do not feel guilty about this or feel like you’re being selfish etc. They are only
saying this because they are resentful and feel it’s unfair that you should have a chance of happiness.
This is YOUR RIGHT so you have nothing to feel ashamed of. Please read the section Why Our Parents Behave As They Do’
on our website for further explanation. In
terms of what you have to do if your parents don’t listen to you and order you to marry from Pakistan, our advice is
first to remain strong and make it very clear that you will not do this. You also have to be very very careful that they don’t
trick you into a marriage by example taking you to Pakistan for a ‘hoilday’ and then trapping you whilst abroad.
Many girls who have faced the same problems often leave home and stay with a close friend and after a few weeks their parents
give in and then let go of the idea. Only you can judge if this will work or make things worse, but most often this tactic
works for many girls. Hope you can get through this, If you need any more advice please contact us again
My mum says that
it’s in our culture!!!!
Yes it is your mums culture
but not Islam. Culture and your religion Islam are two very different things. Your dilemma is a common one faced by thousands
of British Pakistani’s. We advise that you NEVER follow the example
of your sister. You must marry from your own country (England) and not marry someone from another
country. In Pakistan a woman is worth less than dirt. What do we have in common with people from Pakistan? They only
link we have with that country are our parents, and we know that they arrange these marriages purely for cultural reasons.
Their decisions are not based on what Islam says. Your mother has NO RIGHT in Islam to marry you of her choice. She will never allow you to marry from outside her
family or of your choice. YOU MUST BE STRONG AND FIGHT THIS. I promise you if you listen to your mother
who is just going to do this just to please her brother or sister and get a guy to marry you just for money and a British
passport you will live a life of hell GUARANTEED. There are no happy marriages between Pakistanis and us
if there are we are still waiting for an email.
We have thousands of messages and none of a happy marriage.Another thing you have to realise is that no person in the
world has the right to choose who you spend the rest of your life with. This is your basic human and Islamic right. Our parents
have the right to be loved, respected and cherished but loving and respecting them doesn’t mean destroying your life
for the sake of pleasing them. We know of cases where 2 British first cousins are not allowed to marry each other because
the man wanted to marry the ‘wrong‘ first cousin out of his cousins. So he is forced by his parents to marry the
‘other’ cousin who he does not want to marry. So please do not fall for the emotional blackmail trap that your
family might use to force you to marry this man. In this culture marriage of your choice is completely forbidden.
In Islam it is the opposite, marriage of your choice is the ONLY option!
There are a few lucky ones who marry from England, you have to become one of them.Not
only will you destroy your life if you don’t you will also have a bad, useless heartless father for your future children
if you marry from Pakistan. Research proves
that almost all if not all Pakistani people marry a British person for a red document called a British passport. We at Pakmarriages,
are the leading authority on this subject and know for fact that there is not a single happy marriage between these two very
different countries. When you marry someone
whose first language is English i.e. a British born person you can joke, laugh and talk to each other,you can understand each
other, communicate and bring up your future children in a common way. You even watched the same TV programmes when you were
kids and played the same games!
Whatever
you do not marry this person, and if God forbid you do not listen as sometimes happens it will be too late. He will never
be your husband he will always live like a tenant in your house. We fully understand that all this may be very hard for you to do, as you are thinking we have not
even met all the men in Pakistan, but we are only speaking from the immense experience we have. They are all the same.
Please also read the Real Life Stories section on my website which is just a fraction
of the stories sent to us. Allah is the
most merciful, He is our creator and the one who is
closest to us. We see small and large miracles in our lives when we believe and have good intentions (Niyah) about everything.
Allah loves giving to those who ask from him and comes running to help and guide those who come walking towards him. This
is your test and it is not right for you to sacrifice your life and happiness for this corrupt backward culture.Statistically
speaking 55% of British Pakistani’s marry their first cousins. Consequently they are 13 times more likely than the general
population to produce children with genetic disorders, and that one in ten children of cousin marriages either dies in infancy or develops a serious
disability. Thus Pakistani-Britons, who account for some 3% of all births in the UK, produce "just under a third" of all British children with genetic illnesses. Yes, I know it’s scary but this
is what comes from not following the Islamic path.
Women who choose
to ‘respect’ their parents wishes and not marry of their own choice and end up for example
marrying their cousin from Pakistan, are 100% guaranteed a life
of hell as explained in our website.
What is ABSOLUTELY
UNBELIEVABLE is that our parents are willing to take the risk that their daughter might run away from home causing them HUGE
dishonour in the family/community but they will not accept their daughter marrying a decent Muslim man with whom she will
being happy for the rest of her life!If you ever try to challenge their culture with
Islam they will defend it, sometimes violently. Sadly if you do go to a Pakistani Imam for advice, you are most likely to
be given a cultural response such as ‘’ you must respect your parents as they know better’’ rather
than a truly Islamic view. Please don’t get me wrong, I am not at all claiming that our parents live non-Islamic lives.
They do follow the basic teachings of Namaz, Fasting, Zakat etc. but on top of this they follow a culture which is against
Islamic shariah. The culture that our parents follow makes it almost impossible to marry of our own choice.
There is a very simple explanation for this. Pakistani parents have the belief that their children are their PROPERTY and
they have OWNERSHIP over them for life. They control our every move from birth onwards. This is why they are so strict and
deal with us so harshly. The reason so many of us rebel is because this goes completely against our western values and Islamic
belief. It is haram
to marry where a choice has not be given to you, in which case your Nikah will be invalid and you will
be living in sin.
Question: Honestly I’ve just read your homepage
and I cant help but just cry my eyes out. All of what you’ve wrote is exactly how I feel just trapped in this ridiculous
culture.
Me and my other half , we're
both from England, met at colllege. we haven’t broke it to our parents that we’re
together cos we know we wont be allowed to marry without running away. we’ve both told our mothers but they’re
not having it cos they’re scared of what people are going to say.
i cant help but feel so upset after reading
your homepage. i will definitely have a read of the rest.Good to know that there are so many people
out there who feel the same way. I always feel really alone.I dont know how to approach my parents about my other half either,
he’s really nice, Islamic and respects and loves me soooo much honestly,
your site is amazing!!!
I read the black magic and taweez page too. it helped
a little as i remember all the knots and stuff when i was in Pakistan. recently I’ve
overheard my parents plan to pay 250 pounds to some fake peer who will do magic on me so I marry someone from Pakistan this
summer when we all supposedly will go. it’s so horrible and nobody understands. I went to Pakistan when
I was 13 and I thought it was a holiday.
They tried their level best for me to get married, I don’t
know how and when but I didn’t and I escaped and came back to England. It was a horrible experience and I know what
they are like. I put it down to Allah (SWT) looking after me and they brought me back safe and sound without having been
married off. I am also grateful to Allah (SWT) that I went when I was 13 so I could experience what they are like
and what they’re intentions are. Otherwise if i went now, I wouldn’t have known and with the influence of
taweez and their fake charm and pamperingi would’ve married them.
i have a place at uni and i'll
be attending from September onwards. my parents have talked about marriage to me ever since i was 13 and it ruined my
childhood so much so i was always thinking like a 25 year old instead when i was meant to just be a child. playing with
other children. but that wasn’t the case. because of uni now they definitely want to take me to Pakistan and marry my
cousin that I’ve been promised to since I was born. I don’t want to. I really don’t like their family.
His father (my uncle) came to england through a sponsorship and said in words that "English girls dont have
self respect ( there all tarts basically) They should marry a pakistani guy, give him indefinite stay and the passport
and then us paksitanis can divorce them so they can re marry a girl from pakistan and bring her over, because they will
respect you!!!".
I have told my dad this, but he won’t listen. I have told him there are good
people in England to marry, but he wont listen. he is afraid i will marry outside the caste and this will bring him shame
in the community. (exactly what is described on one of your pages on the website that i had a read of and i just sat
and cried).
With the man i want to marry his family is of a lower caste, we are from a higher caste.
it is unacceptable. i know if I sit and talk to my dad he will kill me. I can imagine him getting a knife and stabbing
me, i know he will do that because I have witnessed and stopped the domestic violence between my parents ever since i was
a child. We are trying to get our families to meet coincidentally but planned by us. we dont know how to make this happen,
it is so difficult.
The only thing that
has ever helped, is duas and faith in Allah SWT.
Answer:
Assalamoalikum Thank you for your email. It’s astonishing that our parents can be so dedicated
to their corrupt and sometimes evil culture so much so that they can do black magic on their own children. By the way
Black Magic is shirk meaning those that practice it are no longer Muslim as they have to submit to the will of Jinn and Shaitaan
instead of obeying Allah. But that doesn’t mean I am calling your parents non Muslim (only Allah can be the judge of
that) I’m just saying this is one of the biggest of sins. The ‘OK’ bits of the culture
are things like respecting elders and guests but most of it has nothing to do with our beautiful deen of Islam.
Rather it is the opposite. Now regarding your dilemma if this brother you want to marry is a good person
there is absolutely no reason why you cannot marry him. Even more important is that they are not proposing an alternative
other than a passport seeking abuser of a guy from Pakistan. Please see our ‘Real Life Stories’ section to see
what hell to expect if you listen to your parents on this matter. Please please please please do not marry anyone from Pakistan. It’s better
to stay single all your life. Now you have apparently found a good man Alhamdulilah. What you need to do now is be very strong
and tell your parents there is no reason why he is not acceptable. Speak to them with respect and try to convince them with
love and kind words.
Try to get a brother or sister to support you. Whatever you do NEVER EVER go to Pakistan.
Keep trying. If they just don’t listen then you will have to do istikhara and ask Allah for guidance. I will email you
on how to do istikhara shortly. This is a big test for you and for him. You have to think of your whole life.
You can not sacrifice your life and your future children’s lives for the wrong reason and wrong principle. Don’t
delay it for too long if you are both ready i.e. can financially and emotionally support each other see when is the right
time. A nikah with someone you don’t want is not a valid nikah so you have to marry of your own choice. If you go ahead
with your choice you need to be prepared for a tough ride as they will probably disown you for a while, sometimes years but
eventually they will come round inshAllah. Most parents do. At the time they say ‘tum hamaray liyay mar gayee ho’
or ‘You are as good as dead to us’.
You must be sure this man is the right one for you
in terms of being a good husband, father and provider of your needs. If he is then they have no reason to object. May Allah
help you and keep making dua. There are some useful Duas we will add to this website. You also need to read the 4 Qul Surahs
all the time as the black magic can convince you to marry someone. Don’t forget we are here to guide you inshAllah.
When you met your future ‘mother in law’
she really liked you but the answer is still no. This is a very typical response from our parents and so far from Islam that
"the girl is really nice" BUT she is not our caste, from our city, our sect, our family or even the right cousin
he/ she is the one wrong one you have chosen etc.
This is not allowed in Islam. Refusal or acceptance of you or
him from either parents can ONLY be on the basis of your character, piety and taqwa or lack of.
MashAllah
you both seem to be very sensible and please don't give this up for anything. This is your future, your happiness and
you need to remain steadfast. Its our duty to fight these Jahil and evil ideas so that it becomes the norm for future generations
to marry of their own choice.
We pray Allah make this easy for you all. Take your time and a Nikah is recommended
especially if you both fear doing any haraam. If you can be patient then it is better. Patience is
a virtue of the pious.
Also remember eventually they will get over it. They always do, time is a healer,
the best healer.
“Patience is bitter, but
its fruit is sweet.”
Yes our work is risky as many people hate what we do as it fights these evil and haram
concepts that people refuse to give up for anything but Alhamdulilah we have the vast majority of people who support us and
appreciate our small but important contribution. We hope we can inspire others to make the world a better place in their own
way and spread the message . InshAllah
Your feedback would be very much appreciated.
Email us at pakmarriages@yahoo.com
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